Quiet Schmoo	Party Schmoo

What do you want to know?
     What is a Schmoo?
     How did I end up with the nickname of Schmoo?
     Where is the resume of Schmoo?
     What's the journal thing?

What is a Schmoo?

     The Shmoo first appeared in the strip in the Li'l Abner comic strip in August 1948. According to Shmoo legend, the lovable creature laid eggs, gave milk and died of sheer esctasy when looked at with hunger. The Shmoo loved to be eaten and tasted like any food desired. Anything that delighted people delighted a Shmoo. Fry a Shmoo and it came out chicken. Broil it and it came out steak. Shmoo eyes made terrific suspender buttons. The hide of the Shmoo if cut thin made fine leather and if cut thick made the best lumber. Shmoo whiskers made splendid toothpicks. The Shmoo satisfied all the world's wants. You could never run out of Shmoon (plural of Shmoo) because they multiplied at such an incredible rate. The Shmoo believed that the only way to happiness was to bring happiness to others. Li'l Abner discovered Shmoos when he ventured into the forbidden Valley of the Shmoon, against the frantic protestations of Ol' Man Mose. "Shmoos," he warned, "is the greatest menace to hoomanity th' world has evah known." "Thass becuz they is so bad, huh?" asked Li'l Abner. "No, stupid," answered Mose, hurling one of life's profoundest paradoxes at Li'l Abner. "It's because they're so good!"

     Ironically, the lovable and selfless Shmoos ultimately brought misery to humankind because people with a limitless supply of self-sacrificing Shmoos stopped working and society broke down. Seen at first as a boon to humankind, they were ultimately hunted down and exterminated to preserve the status quo. (Thought extinct after the 1948 adventure, one Shmoo always seemed to escape to Dogpatch's Valley of the Shmoon to form a new colony and a later plot revival by Capp). Licensed Shmoo merchandise became a huge phenomenon in the late '40s and early '50s, spawning a wide variety of dolls, toys, glasses, wallpaper, belts, books, jewelry, balloons, clocks, ashtrays, cannisters, salt & pepper shakers, dairy products, banks, belts and ear muffs. There was even an official Shmoo fishing lure! These are all highly collectible items today.

Taken from the History of Shmoo: http://www.lil-abner.com

How did I end up with the nickname?

     Okay. So the name is misspelled. When I first had to write down the name on something official, it was just a guess. Since then I've learned that I have been spelling it wrong for years. I can live with that... The story:

     I adopted a kitten in the Summer of 1994. I called the local animal society and asked if there were any white kittens that needed a home. I wanted white because David (my roommate at the time) had a solid black cat named Jedi, and I wanted to get a kitten that could oppose "The Jedi". I was called back that same afternoon with the address of a lady that had one for sale. The lady that had the white kitten wanted it to be named Coal because of its dark spot on the forehead. When I got the flea-infested kitten home, it was taken straight for a bath. (Flea infestations are NOT cool.) Well, wouldn't you know it, the dark spot on the forehead washed out in the bath and I had a very edgy white kiitten. It took months before Jedi and the unnamed kitten could live together peacefully, but they finally settled into a routine.

     The kitten was without a true name for many months. I just couldn't come up with one that sounded good. It was later that Fall that Anita (one of the Tae Kwon Do club members) came over to study and tossed out the name Shmoo. Just in defense, she didn't know how to spell it either, but she did know the origins of the name. She said that it looked like a Shmoo and went into describing a Shmoo. The name stuck. When I finally took the cat into the vet for a checkup, I put Schmoo down on the registry. It was official.

     Since that Fall, Schmoo has grown to be a match of his namesake. He is an overly large white blob of fur. Unless he is threatened by the vacuum cleaner or something similar, he's very laid back and tolerant of everything. He is attracted to light and heat. Put something in the room like a space heater, and he will sit close enough to scare me into thinking he's going to spontaneously combust. Show him some attention and he's your friend. Bring the neighbor's dog over and he'll just sit and watch. Give him a little catnip...

What's the journal thing?

     Just a collection of short monologues about different aspects of life. I like to ramble at times about various subjects and when there's no one here to ramble to, I just type it in. Putting stuff online gives me the chance to add pictures and sounds to an otherwise boring essay. For those who want to know more about me, read up. If you're going to be closed-minded about the whole thing, then you should just stop reading now. If you disagree or even if you agree with something, feel free to email me or whatever... I'm always open for conversations. Enjoy!